8.02.2011

Yes. Hmmm. Quite.

So it has been quite a while, as I have been made aware.  Mostly because I don't really want to face myself.  It's summer here, which means it seems like "winter" . . . wanting to hibernate, stay inside, not face the world.  Outdoor activities I treasure are just not pleasurable in this kind of heat.  So there's that.  Also, I still haven't figured out my "employment situation", if you will.  Oh, I'm employed.  Just serving at some barely successful restaurant.  I enjoy the people, anyway.  But the bigger questions still hang about me.  The boy wants me working more.  Which I can understand.  I'm not contributing as much as I could be.  And he deserves to reap the fruits of his labour, which he can't really do if he's paying off my student loans.  I just need a  production.  I need to get off my butt and memorize a classical monologue so I'm properly prepared if a good audition floats my way.  There is a Faire nearby in the fall, so I was thinking about doing that.  It seems to be volunteer, as in not paid, but really, any extracurricular will do.  I'm just sort of stagnating.  Not to mention my weight is creeping up on me.  The boy and I are probably going to join a gym and take cardio classes together.  Nothing sounds less appealing than failing in front of peers.  But we're fats.  We need it.

Other than those bits, I have nothing, really.  Just settling in.  I made a big girl purchase the other day!  Bought my first real bed.  It is ginormous.  King sized mattresses are the epitome of luxury.  It fits three people.  It is a three people bed.  Or a siamese twin and one of their significant others.  It's just unnecessarily large.  And we love it.  And my cat appropriately christened it this morning with some barf.  He really needs to stop eating so fast.

I'm learning bits of Spanish from working at my restaurant, as it is a Teximex kinda place. 

But really, nothing doing.  Nothing worthwhile.  Social media is difficult lately because it is just about my home Faire's season.  I see friends posting pics and statuses about their rehearsals and such.  It eats at me in a way that does not flatter me.  I so wish it didn't.

No comments: